teaching an "i can" attitude

i have notice lately that emma says "i can't" like 50 times a day. at first it was just annoying and i figured she just didn't want to do what i was asking/telling her to do. then after seeing her reaction to actually doing something she said "i can't" to at first,  i realized that most of the time she actually believes that she can't do something.

after much thought over the past few weeks i have come to realize that most of this is my fault. 

you see, emma is my first born and a girl. that combination=over protective mom.

i have told her way too many times that she can't do things because she is too little, may get hurt, or worse....dirty! all this time i thought i was protecting her but now it seems to have backfired and she has an "i can't" attitude.

it's kind of interesting to me that i am just now figuring this all out and i think it is actually because of kellen. since he is a boy and all i let him pretty much do whatever he wants like play in the dog water, dig in the dirt, climb anything he thinks he can and feed himself messy foods. he is only one and has probably had more bumps and bruises than emma. now the kid thinks he is king of the world, is determined and can master most things he puts his mind to. 

unfortunately i can't take back the 3 1/2 years of over protective parenting with emma but i can help to rebuild her confidence now. i need to teach her that clothes wash and scrapes heal as long as you are trying your best it's all okay. i want her to feel the sense of accomplishment when she does something hard, even if it is just climbing the ladder at the park. i want her to actually believe that she can do anything she sets her mind to. so for now i am going to help her, push her, and believe in her until she can learn for herself that she can do hard things.

via